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. carpet muncher, get it?"Subtlety has never been my big sis's best asset. We finally sat. I was still very worried about a faux pas from my loving nutritionist. Then it happened!As I began pouring two gallons of gravy (as lumpy as one of the Three Stooges skulls) over five pounds of lumpier mashed potatoes, she could remain silent no longer. "Do you know what that crap is doing to your body?"Her diatribe brought jeers and profanities from others across the table. Soon, clumps of spuds were being launched at us by spoon catapults. It was like "Game of Thrones, the Vegan Years." I had to get her out of there before chainsaws were deployed. She is mine to protect. This is the woman I want to spend the rest of my... Spring with. I must admit I have an intense fear of commitment, it's like a disease. But she's my girl today and I'll fight for her. I took her hand and we fled, hurdling rose bushes and drainage ditches as my family lit torches and began the classic angry mob pursuit, fresh. And yet I kept pondering about sticking one of those inserts into my penis tip or maybe something like it in my anus. What the hell?What made me think of having to insert one of those little tubes was a dumb thing to ponder. I quickly put that out of my silly mind as I noted others were all smiling at me. Then I realized the thought actually regarded me putting my penis into a teat duct? No. I was supposed to put my erection into something like a duct and I had a thought about the milking machine again. So confusing.The evening glow had changed mood and I was able to see my bunk mates in that different light, different than the morning, which seemed to reveal more of what made them so unusual. They were working with me and I was able to look without feeling I was staring. I was so much more comfortable.I couldn’t get over what a relief I felt because I was for the first time becoming like a member of the team. I sensed they were accepting me. I wondered if they would have accepted me.
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